Friday, May 3, 2013

Dog pee, hair sand and angels

As if I had nothing else to do in my life right now (you know, except try to get off the couch without having to pee and having nice long 2-hour naps in the afternoon), we woke up this morning to a very wet bed. First thought: did my water break? We quickly ruled that out - don't worry.

Second option: our ceiling is leaking. At the same time, Ryan and I looked up at the ceiling. Dry. I won't lie: we were confused.

We then both looked back at the bed. Bauer wasn't there, as he jumps off the bed quite quickly after he hears any inkling of Aryn moving in her room. The poor kid moves and BAM! - Bauer jumps off the bed to run downstairs to hide. It's not even like she bothers him. She says hi, wants to pet him, and then goes on to something else. But because he's a grumpy old man (at 5 years old), and he just hates her.

His blanket was damp, and he was sleeping at or about the same place the big wet spot was. So, quick diagnosis: Bauer peed the bed. It didn't smell like pee. It didn't even look like pee. It looks like water. There was no water glass or cup in or around our bed. There is no other way the water could get there unless Bauer, somehow, put it there.

Maybe he was licking the bed? Maybe he was panting? Maybe he was drooling? Maybe he was dreaming of swimming in a lake and miraculously created water out of thin air?

... is he Jesus?

Maybe I should be nicer to him...

Regardless of what that water was or how it got there, we decided the same thing: the comforter needed to be cleaned.

So I posted on Facebook, asking where I can wash a king sized comforter. I knew of the local laundromats, but the last thing I wanted to do at 9 months pregnant was hang out at a laundromat for 3 hours with a toddler while my comforter got washed and dried.

Angel moment: someone I barely know (she is my mom's hairdresser) knocked on my door at just before 9am asking to take my comforter. I was so confused and made her repeat herself 4 or 5 times before I understood that she was coming to do something kind for a somewhat stranger. Shocked, I gave her the comforter.

By the way: it is possible to over-thank someone before it gets annoying. I discovered that today.

It is also possible to shock the crap out of someone with kindness. I discovered that, as well, today.

Not long after this happened, we went over to a friends house for a play date. I have said this before, and I will say it again: I have the best baby group ever. The women in my baby group are fantastic. I never leave feeling judged or that my kid is hated or bad or that I'm doing a bad job raising her. I always leave refreshed, grateful and exhausted. As does my daughter.

Today was no exception.

Although, she did leave filthy. I mean, black and brown and filthy. Aryn discovered sand today. And it was love at first sight. Mama, on the other hand, was not so in love with it.

First thing we did when we got home (after a 5-minute-crying-uncontrollably drive home) was go in the bathtub. I had to carry my 40lb toddler up the stairs while she cried, absolutely distraught that I ended her play date and so overly exhausted that she couldn't calm down long enough to just fall asleep. Into the bathtub she went. Quick black shower, hair washed, and thrown into bed where she literally fell asleep within seconds.

There is sand everywhere still.

And I don't even care.

There are lots of battles between my daughter and myself, from forcing her to pee before we leave the house to letting me flush the toilet post-poop before I go into the bathroom (you know, cuz I hate the smell), to making her put on a damn sweater when it's cold out and she is refusing. I decided today that hair sand was not going to be a fight. And I want to run to Walmart and buy some sand right now for her brand new sand table that I bought at a garage sale for $30.

Yep, that's right. $30. I am the Garage Sale QUEEN.

Oh, I forgot to mention: Pull-Ups suck ass. Seriously. She wears them to bed because she pees in her sleep, which she did today. And instead of keeping the pee inside said Pull-Ups, the pee went everywhere in her bed. So at 6:20pm, I have done - technically - 3 loads of laundry due to one of my two 'children' peeing on the bed.

It's not wrong to have a little wine while pregnant, right??

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