Sunday, July 29, 2012

The New Blog

For awhile now, I've been wanting to change the direction of my blog. Instead of stories only of Aryn, I wanted to write about our life. We have a great life, full of love, great friends, amazing family, and memories that should be shared. I've wanted to link our lives to photos, and I wanted to dabble in my love for photography.

Why haven't I?

Many reasons, really. One, I didn't like the idea of strangers reading about our lives. Yet, I posted photos and stories of Aryn so.... that is a stupid one. Two, am I too hilarious for blogging? Three, everyone and their dog is a photographer; how would I be any different with my one-lens camera? Plus, I'm not that good. Four, people will see what chaotic, psycho lives we lead. 

Then I thought.... everyone has chaotic, psycho lives.

I have many favourite blogs that I read religiously. I do not want my blog to be a mirror to them... yet, I can foresee that happening. 

I love to write; I have been writing stories my whole life. I blog about Bauer, I write about Aryn, and I am amazing at bbm'ing. 

So how can I make MY blog different from all the others? 

I do not really know.

I do know that the past 2 years, since Aryn has been born, has been a real growth for our family. "Obviously," you'd say. But more-so for me. I went from being someone who is the centre of every friendship circle, someone who is the life of the party, someone who had a great self-esteem and vibrant personality.

I am not that any more.

I am now more of a wallflower. I worry more about what people think of me that I don't always say exactly what I want to. I stress more about what people think of me or see me as, than who I want to be. 

Parenthood made me that way!

Am I a good mother? Is everyone else a better mother than me? Do I look good? Other moms look better than me. How many mistakes am I making? How come I can't get around to making supper every day? Why don't I do this? Why don't I do that? 

I think I'm crazy. 

I'm lucky to have an amazing husband who reassures me I'm awesome, but sometimes I don't believe him.

So this is my new blog... I am turning over a new leaf. It's going to take time, because I am going to change who I am, what I want, who I want to be, and the kind of wife and mother I need to be. 

I am excited, I am nervous, and I am scared of failing.

But with Ryan by my side, and my beautiful baby to give me hugs and kisses every day, not only will I succeed, but I will be better than I imagined.


  1. I hope you enjoy your new journey, Denise. You write beautifully. It is full of happiness and honesty and I think that's why it's enjoyable. All the best to you while you let yourself become so vulnerable. always remember that you have lots of people who have your back, but most of all, have so much fun!

  2. You are a beautiful Mother, wife and friend! Always remember that. You look fantastic, Aryn idolizes you, YOU are her everything and that is all that matters! Oh and supper is overrated;-)


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